just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
