Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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