I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Randomize
