she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
