I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
