He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
