Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
