Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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