fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize