If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
