how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize
