We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
