Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
