When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
