I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize