I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
