Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
just tell him i said nine months
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
