we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
