i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
