How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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