as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
