Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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