i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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