it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize