tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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