So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
