im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
