just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize