she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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