I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
