The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
