grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
