I'm eating all of the evidence.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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