in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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