Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
