apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
it glows. i had to have it.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
