Porn is love you can see.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
