Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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