Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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