I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
