I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
