i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
she pinky promised me she was 18
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
