there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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