i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
