I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize