The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
