yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
