sorry about calling you the devil all night.
worst night to have a conscience
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
