My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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