Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
