We won't sleep together?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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