PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
