Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
